05 June 2009

The Preacher's Son

It seems that there once was this old "fire & brimstone" Texas country preacher who sent his son off to college in the big city. But, after hearing tales of the worldly and licentious ways of college students he became worried and set off to visit and check up on the lad.

Upon arriving he found the boy was out and his room empty. The preacher thought a moment and then decided on his course of action and went back out for a quick shop.

Upon returning to the still empty room he laid on the desk a silver dollar, a bible, a half-pint of whiskey, and a Playboy magazine. He then hid behind the closet door awaiting the young man's return. He thought to himself, "If he picks up the bible he'll be a preacher like me, if he picks up the silver dollar he'll be a businessman, if he drinks the liquor he'll become a drunken bum, and if he looks at the magazine he'll become a womanizing no-good.

Sure enough, the youngster soon returned to his room for a couple of text books and as he turned to leave for his next class he noticed the items on the desk. He put the silver dollar in his pocket, tucked the bible under his arm, took a big swig from the booze and took a glance at the centerfold before leaving.

As the door closed behind the departing youth his devastated preacher father collapsed in agony on the bed. "Oh good Lord spare me," he wailed, "my son's going to become a Republican Legislator".

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